When I Signed Up to Become a Parent...

When I signed up to become a parent, I expected certain things. 

I knew I'd experience sleepless nights. I knew I'd kiss boo boos, plan birthday parties, and volunteer with the PTA.  When I became a parent, I had a vision of what my life was going to be. 

Never in my plans were appointments with surgeons, therapists and psychiatrists. The words "esophageal abnormality," "thoracotomy," "Aspergers," or "autism" never appeared in my plans. But we aren't given the hand we plan for, are we?  

We're dealt whatever hand God chooses for us and its up to us how we play our cards.  

So many of my friends have faced a different hand of cards than the one they expected.  I've had friends lose their child to cancer before her third birthday.  Friends that have watched their children fight genetic diseases; friends that have lost their child's other parent; and, friends that have been told that their child may never talk or be independent.  My friends did not ask for or expect the hand they were dealt, yet they all have one thing in common:  They've done an amazing job playing that hand.  

They are wonderful parents and love their children in some crazy, unbelievable way that they never could have imagined before becoming a parent.

It may be tempting to look at the hand dealt to the parent next to you and wish you had their cards, but don't.  We don't pick our cards and we can't trade them in.  For some reason, God specifically chose us for the cards we have.  It is our job to play them the best way we know how.

Yesterday, Gabriel was given a preliminary diagnosis of Asperger's (or "mild autism" by the new diagnostic standards) and tomorrow Cadence will have a CT scan to determine the next step in the "quarter saga."  I definitely didn't expect my story of parenthood to include these twists and turns, but that's the journey I'm on... and I wouldn't trade it for the world. 

Responsibility: Giving Back

One of the most important values that we try to instill upon our children is responsibility.  In addition to being responsible for typical kid issues such as remembering their homework and cleaning their rooms, we focus on "grown-up" responsibilities too such as being responsible to this amazing planet we call home and being responsible for those less fortunate, both near and far.  After all, we aren't raising children, right?  We're raising responsible adults, who happen to still be children.

This weekend, Cadence and I had the opportunity to, once again, prepare dinner and serve some homeless families from our community.  We sat around the dinner table with them and talked about the beautiful fall weather we've been having; their plans for the upcoming weeks; and one family even shared how they came to be homeless.  Their story was something that could easily happen to pretty much everyone I know.

They had children that were around Cadence's age and she had a great time playing basketball and soccer with them.  This is the second time that Cadence has helped with this program and I continue to be very proud of how well she does.  She has never asked the children questions or made them feel uncomfortable.  She doesn't play with them any differently than she does the kids in our neighborhood.  She was having so much fun playing that it was difficult to get her to leave.  She probably would have stayed their all night if I would have let her.

I continue to be impressed by Cadence's compassion for the world around her and for the personal responsibility that she feels towards helping others.  Her birthday is on October 29th.  A month or so ago, she approached me and told me that she didn't want any presents.  Instead, she would like everyone to collect new kids' shoes in her honor so she could donate the shoes to a charity for distribution to children in need.  I'm so proud of that kid.

A New School Year - New Schools - New Attitudes

Over the summer, I vowed that this school year would be different.  Last year, I was at the school three times in the first week for Gabriel.  He threw terrible fits and his teacher couldn't get him to focus.  The teacher didn't know how to handle him and, frankly, didn't want to learn.  He began to despise going to school and started acting out more at home.  We requested a new classroom, but were told that the school "didn't do that."  Instead, the principal suggested that I sign a waiver giving my consent to Gabriel not attending kindergarten at all.  That way, they could have him come in for just a few hours each day and send him home when needed without worrying about his attendance.  I refused and was completely appalled that that was the best suggestion the principal had.

Around Christmas break, we began our search for a new school.  While looking at schools for Gabriel, I found a few that I thought Cadence would like as well.  She was doing well in her current school, but I was surprised to see how many schools we had access to that I thought would be better for both of my children.  Both kids were really open to the idea of changing schools so we began touring them.

They were both accepted to several schools in our area.  Cadence ultimately chose to attend Sterling School and Gabriel chose East North Street Academy of Math and Science.  This meant that I'd have three kids in three schools (since William is in preschool).  The first few weeks were tough, but we have it down to a routine now.  The kids love their schools.  Gabriel still has some behavior issues, but nothing like last year.  His biggest problem now is calling out all of the answers when it isn't his turn.  He at the top of his class for reading and math and adores his teacher.  Cadence has many opportunities at her current school that she never had before.  She's involved in several after school clubs and is participating in her school's talent show next month.  It is amazing what a change in environment can do.

To all of you that have children struggling in school, I strongly suggest you take a step back and evaluate the school they are in.  My children were in one of the highest rated elementary schools in our district, but that didn't matter.  There were other schools out there for them that better fit their needs and they are flourishing this year.

Perfect Toddler Storm

I was awake and I'd checked on the kids twice.  They were watching Aquabats in their new TV room and playing with light sabers.  It was a typical non-school morning.  I buried myself back under the blankets one last time while I debated between starting the day off with a run, a trip to the grocery store or cleaning house.  Suddenly, the doorbell rang.  It wasn't a normal ring.  It rang several times in a row, meaning one of two things - there was an emergency outside or it was a kid.

Chris rushed downstairs and threw open the door to find Liam standing outside, wearing a girl's pull-up and eating a block of cheddar cheese.

I can explain.

I promise that, generally speaking, I do not allow my toddler to roam the neighborhood alone, in a mostly-naked state and I do not condone eating entire blocks of cheddar cheese (although that does sound pretty good, doesn't it?).  A series of event that, when combined, created this weekend morning conundrum. 

1.  On Friday afternoon, one of the big kids accidentally snapped off the doorknob cover on the garage door.  They told me about it, but we were in a rush to make it out so I figured I'd fix it when we came back home.

2.  We completely ran out of pull-ups.  We don't use them that often since he only needs them at night and it always sneaks up on me when we are low.  Luckily, a few weeks ago, I received a sample of a pretty girl's Good Night brand pull-up with a big purple butterfly.  Liam wore that, and only that, to bed last night.

3.  When we came home last night, I left the garage door open because I had to unload some items from the trunk.  I came in the house, took the child lock off of the refrigerator so I could put the items inside, and then ADD'd on something that the kids were doing.  

So, this morning, Liam walked downstairs in his girlie pull-up, opened the refrigerator, secured a block of cheese, opened the back door to the garage, walked out of the opened garage door and plopped himself in the driveway to eat his snack.  Instead of coming back in the house in the direction he left, he chose to ring the doorbell repeatedly, in true toddler fashion.

Needless to say, the childproof knobs have all been secured back in their rightful places.  Toddlers, you give them an inch, they take a block of cheese outside while wearing a girlie pull-up and eat it in the driveway.

Christmas Without the "Stuff"

First of all, I know it has been forever since I've written a post.  I apologize.  I always say I'll get better, but I never do, so this time I am not going to make you any promises.  I'm posting today and that's all that matters.  :)

We've been focusing a lot in our house on reducing the "stuff" that we've accumulated.  We still have a long way to go, but we're getting there.  Our current challenge is getting through the Christmas season without a.) undoing all we've accomplished and b.) celebrating a wonderful Christmas season that the children will look back on and enjoy.  What are your favorite memories of Christmas?  Mine involve making cookies with my mom, going on a sleigh ride, visiting my grandparents, going to see the Christmas lights and Christmas Eve church service.  There are a few toys that stick out in my memory too, but not that many.  I remember my first Nintendo.  I remember receiving a swim suit that I really wanted.  I also remember this giant bean bag chair that was wrapped in a sheet.  For the most part though, my memories involved things that we did and not the things that we received.

With that in mind, as well as our mission to reduce our family spending, we've decided that Christmas will be different this year.  Each child will receive two or three presents to open on Christmas morning.  When purchasing these gifts, we asked ourselves the following questions:  Does it encourage creativity?  Do they have something similar?  Is it educational?  Will it create a family memory?

If you're considering downsizing your children's playrooms, here are a few ideas that I've compiled for gift giving:

1.  Memberships to some sort of activity (the zoo, the children's museum, the recreation centers, etc.)

2.  Gift certificates to an activity (Frankie's Fun Park, Chuck E Cheese's, miniature golf place, bowling, etc.)

3.  Spa trip - there are many spas that have packages designed for little girls

4.  Trip - It doesn't have to be something huge.  A night's stay a town over at a nice hotel with a pool is an adventure to kids

5.  Tickets - To a play, an aquarium, a theme park, etc. - anything that pique's the child's interest

6.  Books - Be careful here as many tend to accumulate a lot of books too; however, if they are a topic that the child enjoys and you know they'll read it, it may be worth the purchase.

7.  Art supplies - Great for older children.  Inspires creativity.

8.  Family board games can create amazing memories

9.  Electronics and accessories - As with books, it's easy to have too many, but generally they do not take up much room and children get a lot of use out of them

10.  Dress up clothes - Again, creativity!

For fun, here's a list of items that I would suggest not be purchased for Christmas or birthday presents:

1.  Anything that does not come equip with an "OFF" button

2.  Something that will get stuck in the foot of the poor unsuspecting person that steps on it

3.  Stuffed animals (the poor things are loved for 10 minutes and then forgotten)

4.  Toys with a lot of parts (kids are going to lose a part - I promise)

5.  Living creatures

6.  Anything that involves an oven (easy bake, cupcake maker, bug factory, etc.) - that's just asking for a trip to the hospital.  Also, have you ever tried to eat an Easy Bake Oven cake?  *gags*

Our goal is to make this Christmas season very special for the children and to help them understand that Christmas is about Jesus and giving and not about the presents they receive.  To help redirect this focus, we're planning some fun activities.  Here are a few of the things that we're doing:

1.  The children are picking out some of their gently-used toys to donate to charity

2.  We'll make cookies together and deliver them to a fire department, police department or hospital on Christmas Eve or Day (we haven't hashed out the details yet)

3.  We'll celebrate the season of Advent and discuss the events leading up to, including and following Jesus' birth

We'll also go see the lights, attend one or more Christmas parades, and play and sing along to Christmas music.  Hopefully, with all that is going on this year, the kiddos won't even notice that their Christmas loot has shrunk dramatically. 

What are your plans for gift giving this year?  Do you have any other items to add to the lists?  I'd especially love to hear suggestions for the do not buy list.  

A Sprint or a Marathon?

When Chris and I first started dating, we stayed up until 2am on a regular basis talking and getting to know each other.  He would groggily walk out the front door and I'd crawl into bed for a few hours before getting up with the kids between 5 and 6am.  I remember explaining my lack of energy to a friend of mine who inquired, "Are you planning on this relationship being a sprint or a marathon?"  I immediately thought, "Marathon!" but realized that I couldn't keep up the pace.  Something had to give.  Chris and I quickly adapted to a new routine that involved more time together on the weekends and less on work nights.  We started into our marathon pace and have been jogging along ever since.

Last school year, I sprinted and I sprinted HARD.  It was the year I did everything.  Well, not everything, but it sure felt that way!  I tried to work around Cadence's school schedule by working from home from 5am until 6:30am and then going into the office from 8am until 2pm.  I was supposed to be finished work at 2pm, but I usually ended up working in the afternoons because there was always something I had to do.  In addition to working, I was a room mom for Cadence's class; I served on the board for my professional organization; I began couponing and even tried to run a frugal parenting site; I focused on raising money for my summer mission trip to Haiti; I attended soccer practices for two children; and, since I wasn't busy enough, I trained for three half marathons.  I did all of this while still trying to keep up with all of my stay-at-home-mom friends when it came to cooking, cleaning, doing laundry and executing Pinterest projects and while trying to keep up with seemingly everyone I had ever known via Facebook.  I was attempting to run a marathon at a sprinter's pace.

This school year, I'm slowing down to the jogging pace that I love and therefore some things are going to have to go.  My children and their activities definitely are not going anywhere and I wouldn't trade them for the world, but that means other things will need to be adjusted.  Other commitments, hobbies and interests that have previously been very important to me will need to go to the back burner for a while to make room.  I'm giving up on trying to keep up with Pinterest and I'm going do the always-dreaded Facebook housecleaning.  ;)  I mean, who really knows 350+ people...?  :)  Please don't take offense.  It is time for me to regroup and focus on what needs my attention the most.  It is time to start my marathon pace especially since this school year is already proving to be a tough run.

Signs of a Working Parent

A week or so ago, I sat down to a meeting for my professional organization at a nice restaurannt.  I looked down at my hands and immediately put them in my lap.  There were Oreo cookies under my fingernails!  You see, I had just left Cadence's class where I read them the story "Diary of a Worm."  After the book, I made them a 'dirt and worms' treat using chocolate pudding, gummy worms and crumbled Oreos, the evidence of which still remained on my poor hands.  I quickly excused myself to the restroom to wash my hands.  While washing, I thought of several other things that have happened to either Chris or I that remind us, and the world, that we are working parents.

Here are a few:

• I've had a pacifier fall out of my pocket in the middle of a conference room full of attorneys.
• A shirt and tie is normal apparel for Chris when coaching our 4-year-old’s soccer team.
• I've walked into an office meeting singing “fruit salad…” to myself, only to have someone respond “yummy yummy!”
• I've had to stop court hearings to take a 15 minute pump break in the empty visiting judge chambers.
• My designer diaper bag now functions as my brief case.
• My 8-year-old has been on a “field trip” with me to serve a subpoena.

I'm sure there are more, but that is all I can think of right now as I've probably blocked the rest out or forgotten them due to lack of space in the 'remembering' section of my brain with all of the PTA meetings, court schedules, soccer practice schedules, work deadlines, birthday parties and professional meetings I have stored up there.

Our Disney Trip and Useful Tips for Families with Small Children

We just got home from our first Disney World trip with all three children. We had a great time during our short trip and we learned a lot about flying with small children, Disney with small children and just traveling with small children in general.

Friday morning we surprised the children by waking them up super early and telling them we were going to Disney World and that we would be flying. They were so excited! We got to the airport with our three children, three carry on bags, three car seats, stroller and diaper bag. Allegiant Airlines kindly checked the car seats, carry on bags and stroller at the check in, free of charge. I had read several places online that it is okay to bring liquids in excess of the three ounce limit if it is for your child. I brought a few juice boxes and some yogurt for the kids. When we got to the TSA check point, I unzipped my lunchbox containing said juice and yogurt and showed it to the TSA agent, who was very nice. She asked if I was responsible for the contents of the lunchbox and I said I was. I then received a lovely TSA pat down. Apparently, that is required since the TSA could not test my kids' juice boxes and yogurt since they were sealed. This brings me to Tip #1: If bringing yogurt, applesauce, juices, etc. on board a plane for your children, make sure it is contained in something that can be opened. Otherwise, you may have the pleasure of really getting to know your TSA agent.

The rest of the flight was pretty uneventful except that it was a bit bumpy at one point and Cadence yelled "Are we going to crash!?!?" Tip #2: Explain the concept of turbulence to your children ahead of their first plane ride. Liam spent the entire plane ride tucked into my Ergo. I touch more on baby wearing in a little bit.

We arrived and had lunch with one of my mommy friends and her daughters. After lunch we tried to check in to the hotel, but there wasn't a room ready for us. We headed to Downtown Disney for some shopping and to meet Chris's aunt for dinner. When we got to Downtown Disney, Gabriel immediately went into a full blown meltdown because we "told him we were going to Disney World." I explained that Downtown Disney was part of Disney World, but he wouldn't hear any of it. He was curled in a fetal position in the floor board of the rental car sobbing. This brings me to Tip #3: If you are arriving in Orlando in the earlier part of the day and not planning on visiting the parks until the next day, either a.) change your plans and go that day or b.) make it very clear to your children that they will see Mickey the next day.

After dinner we checked into our room. Chris headed out to the store to pick up a few things. There are a few things that we always bring with us into the park. Tip #4: Pack an empty soft cooler in one of your suitcases. The night before going into the parks, put some water bottles in your freezer (Tip #4a: ALWAYS get a room with at least a kitchenette.). In the morning, pack your soft cooler with the frozen water bottles, some juice and some soda. Put some cookies and crackers in your diaper bag or backpack. Tip #5: Keep some beer in the fridge for after you return to the room.

On Saturday we went to Magic Kingdom. We brought the stroller, my Ergo, our soft cooler and our diaper bag. The Ergo was worth its weight in gold in the parks. Seriously, if the only two days I ever used it was this past Saturday and Sunday than it was a well worthwhile purchase.Tip #6: If you are a baby wearer, for the sake of your sanity and the sanity of your family, do NOT forget your carrier of choice. I was able to wear Liam on Snow White, It's a Small World, Peter Pan, Aladdin's carpets, all of the show type rides, the carousel and many more. It was amazing! He was able to nap, undisturbed, through several rides. Best. Idea. EVER. The stroller ended up being more of a luggage cart than anything. I contemplated leaving it behind the next day, but it was a nice thing to have. We would basically park it in an area of the park and ride everything around that area. Then we'd get our stroller and move to the next area. It held our snacks and drinks and was great when one of the big kids got tired or we needed a portable time out spot.

Obviously, there are some rides that you cannot wear your baby on. For example, I would not suggest wearing a baby on Space Mountain, Splash Mountain, etc. ;) Tip #7: For those rides that your baby cannot go on, go visit a cast member at the entrance to the ride and ask for a rider switch ticket. One parent can take the bigger kids (or just go by themselves) on the ride. When he/she comes off, the other parent can take the rider switch ticket and go in the Fast Pass lane. The bonus to this is that a person with a rider switch ticket can have up to two additional people with them. Therefore, Chris could take Cadence and Gabriel on a ride. When they got out, I'd take Cadence and Gabriel back on the ride in the Fast Pass lane. It worked beautifully!

We were only in the parks for two days, so we did not want to spend a lot of time waiting in lines to see the characters. I highly recommend scheduling at least one character dining experience while you are there. Last time we visited we did two and this time we did one. I don't think the kids felt like they missed out.

We went to Epcot on Sunday. Tip #8: If you can, plan to spend two days in Epcot. We had to zoom through it since we had to do it all in one day, but we still had fun. Epcot is my favorite park, and Chris's too, so we would have liked to spend more time there. We got a table at the Rose & Crown about thirty minutes before the fireworks. Tip #9: The Rose & Crown has a private viewing area for the fireworks. If you get a table there, your server will escort you out to the viewing area just before the fireworks. It is well worth it! It was rainy and yucky outside and we were able to wait for the fireworks to start in the comfort of our dry dining room, sipping on a beer and munching on a cheese platter. Fantastic.

We thought we woke up this morning in plenty of time to eat our free hotel breakfast (another must for traveling with kiddos) and get to the airport. However, it took us about 20 minutes longer than anticipated and the drive to the airport took another 20 minutes longer than anticipated. Before I knew it, we were arriving closer to an hour before our flight took off rather than the suggested two hours. I was starting to worry. Tip #10: Allow yourself more time than you think you could possibly need in getting back to the airport. We dropped off our rental, checked in and got up to the gate about 25 minutes before our scheduled departure time. A few minutes later, an airline employee came over the speaker. I expected him to announce boarding. Instead, he announced that our flight was delayed for about two hours. Luckily, the airport had a kids' section that was showing kid-friendly movies. We watched movies for the next two hours and then boarded our plane.

All in all, it was a great trip. It was a little stressful, but we survived. We'll definitely do it again when Liam is a little older and can enjoy it more.

Here are a few pictures. The first is my favorite as it pretty accurately sums up the chaos of the weekend. :)

"Mommy, why were people like that?"

That was the question that I received this morning from my bright-eyed eight-year-old daugther while quizzing her for her social studies quiz. They are discussing regions, specifically the Northeast and the South. When I asked her to tell me about Alabama, she mentioned Rosa Parks and Martin Luther King, Jr. I asked if she knew what they did. She gave a very good description of Rosa Parks' famous bus ride and she told me that Martin Luther King, Jr. wanted black and white children to be able to play together. Then she asked me why they weren't allowed to in the first place. I closed my laptop, looked at her and tried my hardest to explain something so disgusting as racisim so that my innocent eight-year-old daughter would understand it but not be overwhelmed by it. She paused for a moment to process it all and almost whispered "Mommy, why were people like that?" I was honestly able to tell her that I didn't know and that it was a very sad time for this country. She paused and thought again. She asked "What would have happened if Martin Luther King, Jr. and Rosa Parks never lived? How would it be now?" Then, before I could answer, she said, "You know how sometimes a white mommy has a brown baby? What would happen to them?" Cadence has several bi-racial friends and, suddenly, she became very concerned for them. I explained some of the hardships that would have faced bi-racial couples and their children in the Civil Rights era but I assured her that things are a lot better now. Not perfect, but better. I didn't want to give her the idea that the world was perfect, because it isn't. But I also didn't want her to worry about it constantly. Then Gabriel, who had been listening intently, piped up and said, "Mommy, what am I?" I smiled and hugged him and said, "You are Gabe and that is all that really matters."

After that we watched portions of Martin Luther King, Jr.'s "I Have a Dream" speech on You Tube and talked about the importance of not judging a person "by the color of their skin but by the content of their character." We also disussed the kids' racial background a bit because they were curious but they ultimately agreed that what they see on the outside doesn't have anything to do with what is on the inside.

That was definitely more than I had planned on doing before breakfast, but I'm glad we had the talk.

I Have a Secret...

I have a secret. You can't tell anyone, okay? Not ANYONE! Especially not someone that will tell my children. Are you ready....? Are you sure? Ok.

We are taking the kids on a surprise trip to Disney World!!!

Provided we do not have a snow day between now and March 9th, Cadence has a long weekend from March 9th through the 12th. We aren't going to tell them until we are ready to leave. We are going to wake them up, drive them to the airport and hop on a plane to Orlando. I'm so excited! It is going to be a very quick trip and we'll only spend two days in the parks (one at Magic Kingdom and one at Epcot). We're planning the trip pretty last minute, but we managed to book a character dining meal on Sunday at Epcot.

Also, we were able to book airfare for all five of us for $338.33! OMG!!! I love a great deal, so I couldn't turn that down. We also scored an amazing deal on our room so we couldn't say no.

We are looking forward to the trip and hope to visit with some friends and family while we are down there too!

Now remember, it's a secret. You can't tell anyone.... ;)

Mommy's New School Year Resolutions

August marks the beginning of a new school year and School Year Resolution time for me. This school year I have some big resolutions.

I resolve to log my at-home hours before school instead of after it which means 4:30 a.m. alarm clocks and 9:00 p.m. bedtimes. It also means more free time in the afternoons. Sure, I'll still have the occasional phone call or email that needs an immediate response, but for the most part, I'll have more time to help Cadence with her homework.

I resolve to work with Gabriel to ensure that he is ready (maybe even ahead?) for kindergarten next year. I resolve to read more to the kids.

I resolve to plan ahead. This means making meals on the weekends and freezing them for during the week. It means packing school lunches the night before and making sure book bags and school projects are ready to go before bed in order to avoid a little voice from the back seat crying, "Oh no, Mommy! My is at the house!" as I'm about to let her out of the van in front of the school.

I resolve to speak less and listen more to my kids. I resolve to not yell so much. I hate yelling at them.

I resolve to get Cadence involved in an after school music program of some sort. She loves music and we really need to encourage that love.

I resolve to fit some me time in there.... somewhere.

Summer Reading

Cadence loves to read and, for that, we are very thankful. Below is the list of recommended summer reading material for rising second graders. She will be able to attend a "reading rock star" party in September if she reads at least ten of these books (although we'd like to see her read more than that). Since all of the kids in the school district are reading the same books, they are generally difficult to come by at the library and most are on a waiting list. If you have any of these books and would not mind letting Cadence borrow them, we would greatly appreciate it! Thanks so much!

-Amelia Bedelia Series --

Parish

--Berenstein Bears Series --

Berenstein

--Cam Jansen Series --

Adler

--Charlie Needs a Cloak --

DePaola

--Chrysanthemum --

Henkes

--Curious George Series --

Rey

--Don't Fidget a Feather --

Silverman

--Flat Stanley --

Brown

--Flossie and The Fox --

McKissack

--Froggy (Series) --

London

--Henry and Mudge Series --

Rylant

--How I Became a Pirate --

Long

--If You Give A Moose A Muffin --

Numeroff

--If You Give a Moose a Muffin --

Numeroff

--If You Give a Pig a Pancake --

Numeroff

--Little Red Cowboy Hat --

Lowell

--Love You Forever --

Munsch

--Magic Tree House Series --

Osborne

--My Teacher's Secret Life --

Krensky

--Nate the Great --

Sharmat

--Nate the Great Series --

Sharmat

--No Jumping on the Bed --

Arnold

--No, David --

Shannon

--No, David --

Shannon

--Officer Buckle and Gloria --

Rathmann

--Owen --

Henkes

--Pirates Don't Change Diapers --

Long

--Poppleton (Series) --

Rylant

--Stellaluna --

Cannon

--Stephanie's Ponytail --

Munsch

--Ten Apples Up On Top --

LeSieg

--That's Good! That's Bad --

Cuyler

--The Art Lesson --

DePaola

--The Doorbell Rang --

Hutchins

--The Hallo-Weiner --

Pilkey

--The Little House --

Burton

--The Napping House --

Wood,

--The Paperboy --

Pilkey

--The Rainbow Fish --

Pfister

--Tomorrow's Alphabet --

Shannon

--When I Was Little --

Curtis

Goals for This Week

It's Sunday night and time to start thinking about the week ahead. I've blogged a lot today. Congrats and thank you if you've kept up! It's okay if you haven't though, I understand. The past few weeks have been a bit crazy and I am learning from the craziness and setting a few goals for myself for the upcoming week.

1. My bedtime is no later than 10:00 p.m.
2. I will get up early enough to make sure everyone has time for a good breakfast.
3. I will spend at least 30 minutes per evening working on laundry or housework.
4. I will stay focused and work as diligently as possible at my job during the day, but when the work day is over, I will focus solely on my family.
5. I will pack Cadence's lunch every evening instead of during the morning.

I'll update again at the end of the week.

The Calm After the Storm

Last night we had a very violent thunderstorm. I was in the grocery store with the kids and the rain on the roof was deafening. One of the managers was kind enough to sit with them while I ran out in the storm to pull the van up to the entrance. The parking lot was a river and, although I ran as fast as I could to avoid the storm, I was soaked. My shoes and socks were drenched and you could have rung my jeans and shirt out like a wash cloth. The manager and a bag boy held umbrellas over us while I loaded the kids into the van as fast as I could. I ran quickly around the van, jumped in and drove home. I don't even think I thanked the manager and I do feel bad about that. Cadence and Gabriel thought the storm was fun and enjoyed seeing Mommy get drenched. I did not think it was so fun. The storm continued throughout the night and this morning the world had a "new" feeling about it. The trees were still dripping and there were puddles everywhere but the air felt fresh. It was a new beginning.

Yesterday's storm made me think of something that happened to me recently. Over the weekend I got caught up in my own "storm" with a mommy group that I have been a member of for the past year. It was stupid really, but it happened. Some of the members were kind enough to hold an umbrella over me while the rain pounded down around me. Others seemed to think the storm was fun and enjoyed seeing me get drenched. I did not think it was fun. The storm continued for a day or so but then I left the mommy group quickly so the storm would stop. I didn't think even think to thank them for their support over the last year or say goodbye and I do feel bad about that. It seems to have quieted for the most part and I hope it stays that way. I'm enjoying the fresh new air.

I'm hoping that I will now have more time to work on things that I've been neglecting. My poor house could use a makeover (or a grenade) and I really need to sort through the kids' clothes to get them ready for spring. Spring! With Spring comes more fun activities. I'm looking forward to my involvement with some charity events through my local paralegal organization. I also hope to go on a few family camping trips and start running again once I find a jogging stroller for Liam. Regardless of what I do, I plan on spending my time focusing on what really matters: my family and I.

Sick Kids

Last Sunday William woke up with a cough. It got worse on Monday and on Tuesday I took him to the doctor's office where they said that he had RSV. RSV is the virus that can cause bronchitis and pneumonia and most children get it before the age of three. Infants are especially susceptible to it. He was put on an oral steroid once a day and a steroid via nebulizer every four hours as needed. The steroids really helped him and within 36 hours he was sounding much better. He is still coughing here and there, but nothing like he was before.

On Friday morning Cadence started feeling bad. She had a sore throat and a fever. I took her to the doctor and they said it could be a virus but they gave me an antibiotic prescription just in case it continued throughout the weekend or her fever got higher. They told me not to fill it unless she needed it. Last night her fever hit 103 so I filled the prescription and sent it to her Nanny & Papa's house (where Cadence is spending the weekend). Hopefully the antibiotic will help her feel better very soon!

I'm beginning to wonder if, with three kids in the house, we will ever have times when no one is sick!

My "Must-Have" Baby Items

When Cadence and Gabriel were little there was only one baby item that I absolutely could not live without:

The Original Nojo Babysling by Dr. Sears

All three of my children have ridden around in the same gray ring sling until they were a year or so old. With Cadence and Gabriel though, my must-have list ended there.

With William however, I have discovered four other must-haves that I didn't discover with Cadence and Gabriel - a few of which could even contend with the Nojo sling for my number one favorite baby item. They are as follows:

Cloth Diapers and accessories

If you would have told me three or four years ago that I would fall in love with cloth diapers, I would have laughed at you and then made some disgusted face at the thought of washing some of the diapers that I had seen my older daughter and son produce. However, when I was pregnant with William I decided to research the whole cloth diapering thing. I got passed the "ick factor" and began thinking about how much money I had spent on diapers for Cadence and Gabriel and how much space those disposable diapers were now occupying in a landfill (and will continue to occupy for hundreds of years).

I bought six Katydid and one Kawaii pocket diapers on Craigslist. My stash had officially begun. I also purchased four bumGenius 4.0 diapers using Target gift cards we had been given when Liam was born. I then began comparing different brands and styles of diapers to decide which would be best for us. We fell in love with the concept of Best Bottom diapers. They have an outer shell with snap in liners. If your baby pees, you just change out the liner. If the baby poops, you change the whole thing. This means that they take up less space in your washing machine than traditional cloth diapers and, since you can use them more than once, they are very cost effective.

We currently have six Best Bottom diapers and about 20 liners. We wash diapers every 3 days or so, hang dry them, and use our pocket diapers on laundry day and to supplement our stash as needed.

In addition to the cloth diapers, we have cloth wipes that we bought from Handmade Burps on Etsy that we adore and a diaper sprayer by bumGenius. That will come in handy when William begins to eat homemade baby food in a few months. We also make our diaper wipe solution and keep it stored in a spray bottle.

With our self-sustaining diaper stash, I can't help but smile every time I pass a mom at Walmart with a box of diapers and a huge pack of wipes. I'm so glad that I don't have to do that anymore.

Infant Carrier Cover

Made by Barlow Baby, an at home business created by a friend of mine from my pregnancy board, Williams carrier cover has quickly become a must-have item. It remains strapped to our carrier. We flip it behind him when we are driving and cover him up when we are taking the carrier from the car to our destination. It protects him from the rain, wind or bright sun. We love it!

Nursing accessories

For some reason breastfeeding never worked out with Cadence and Gabriel. I had a terrible experience in the hospital with Cadence and with Gabriel I really think that the stress factor created by the sudden end to my marriage impacted my supply. With William though, it is going great! It was hard in the beginning. He was a month old before he latched. That meant that until then I went though the vicious cycle of trying to get him to latch; feeding him from a bottle, finger feeder or cup; and, pumping every 2-3 hours around the clock. I barely did anything else. Chris was so supportive. He wasn't going to let me give up and he is the reason that I am still nursing.

In the first few weeks, the best accessories for me were my Medela Symphony pump from the hospital and my Medela contact shield.

Now my favorite items are my nursing cover, which is an Udder Cover but I bought for $2 at a consignment shop and my Lansinoh storage bags. I've tried the Medela bags too, but I'm not a fan. Accessories aside, I am just happy that nursing worked for me this time. Passing the formula section at Walmart is much like passing the diaper section - I smile to myself and am so glad that I don't have to stop.

BabyLegs

Last, but not least, I love William's BabyLegs! They are not leg warmers (boys don't wear leg warmers). They are waist-less, crotch-less pants! Ok, they are leg warmers... But they are adorable and oh so practical! William can wear a onesie without the need for pants over top. This makes diaper changes a breeze!

At $12.00 a pair, they may seem expensive. However, their website usually has some available on clearance and often runs ridiculously awesome sales on clearance items. Recently, they had all of their winter items 75% off, which meant $75 worth of BabyLegs for $18.75. Don't mind if I do! Also, Natural Baby in downtown Greenville also carries BabyLegs. I found some Christmas patterns there on clearance the other day for $3.25 a pair.

There is another great place for on sale BabyLegs: Clothdiaperclearance.com. I bought William a pair of "Ode to Canada" BabyLegs from that site a few weeks ago.

Here is William modeling one of our favorite pairs of Babylegs. The soccer prints that Charlie and Elizabeth gave him for Christmas:

So, for now, those are my most favorite baby items.... for now. :) I am currently waiting for some really cute crocheted items that I traded for some disposable diapers, a baby wrap and some formula that I no longer need thanks to the above-mentioned items. I will probably do a separate entry on them. I'm also beginning to make and deep-freeze William's baby food so cheap ice cube trays are quickly working their way up on my must-have list. Again, that will probably be a separate entry though.

Getting into the routine

We are adjusting to life with me back to work and Liam in daycare. Our schedule is a bit crazy but it works. If you've tried reaching me over the past week, I promise I'm not ignoring you. We just have a lot going on.

Here is what our work day routine should look like. Unfortunately, we are usually running behind a bit, especially in the mornings.:

5:30a.m. - Wake & feed Liam (if he's hungry) then shower, pack up diapers in the laundry room and toss in a load of laundry (or move to dryer if washed last night).

6:00am - Wake up older kids.

6:30am - Threaten older kids with their lives if they do not hurry up and get their clothes on! Make breakfast for older kids, pack van for work/day care (this includes cloth diapers, wet bag, pump, frozen breast milk, lunch, laptop and work I took home last night). Empty dishwasher.

7:00am - See hubby off. Nuke coffee that I haven't had a chance to drink yet (hubz makes it for me every morning). Throw dinner in the crock pot or thaw out frozen casserole or other frozen items I need for dinner that night. Grab breakfast for myself.

7:15am - Out the door! Drop boys off to daycare and daughter off to school.

8am-2:00pm - At office (eat lunch at desk)

2:30pm - Pick daughter up from school and boys from daycare

3:30pm - Put pumped milk from work in the freezer. Move laundry over to dryer (if washed this morning). Throw diapers in the wash on pre-wash cycle. Homework time with daughter then feed Liam.

4:30pm - Start wash cycle on diapers. Work from home if kids are entertained. Otherwise, entertain kids unless it is Wednesday. If Wednesday, pack kids up in van to go to church dinner & youth group.

5:00pm - Cook dinner (all nights except Wednesday and every other Monday. If every other Monday, pack kids up in van and go to friends' house for dinner.)

6:15pm - Eat.

7:00pm - Run dishwasher. Feed Liam. On Thursday - Go to gym and drop kids of in nursery (On Tuesday, move dinner up to 5:15pm and go to gym at 6:00pm). If Monday or Friday, play with kiddos then start baths.

7:30pm - Baths, story, prayers & get kiddos ready for bed.

8:00pm - Big kids to bed.

8:15pm - Get laundry from dryer and fold. Hang diapers in washer. Pack daughter's lunch, set out clothes for all kids

9:00pm - Feed Liam then log into work.

10:30pm - Finish work then get ready for bed.

11pm - Bedtime! :)

If Liam is up a little earlier than 5:30 a.m. to eat than I stay up and log into work since there isn't any point in going back to bed. We spend the weekends when we have all of the kids doing fun family activities. The weekends when the big kids go to their Nanny & Papa's house are spent catching up on the housework and laundry that didn't get finished during the week.

Dear William

Dear William,

Mommy loves you very much. Tomorrow she is going to pack you up in your carseat and take you on a short drive. We'll go to a place with lots of other babies. You'll meet some very nice ladies and then... Mommy will have to go. I don't know why this is so much harder this time. Maybe because I know you are my last little baby. Maybe it's because I thought I had lost you a few hours before you were born. Either way, driving away tomorrow will be extremely difficult. Please know that I love you and I'm doing this out of that love. I'll be driving away tomorrow so that you can live in a decent house in a good school district. I'm doing it so you can have everything you need and some things that you just want. I'm doing it so you can go to college without worrying about massive amounts of debt. I'm doing it for you, your brother and your sister. Please don't be mad at me for it now or later in life. I promise I'm doing the best that I can.

Love,
Mommy

"Snow" Day, how I detest thee...

Yesterday morning, after waking up at 2am and 5am to feed Liam I discover that Greenville County schools were on a 2-hour delay due to inclement weather. Ok. That's not too bad. The kids would get to watch a few cartoons and Liam and I could sleep for another hour or so. No problem. No more than an hour after I discovered that there was a delay did the county change it to a full closing. Seriously? SERIOUSLY!?!?! I looked outside my window. The road was wet and, although there were a few frozen rain drops, for the most part it was just raining.

So now it's nasty outside, school is closed and I am home with all three kids. I could have sent Gabriel to day care (because they have common sense enough to distinguish snow from rain and were therefore open) however I did not want to send him off when Cadence was home. So I figured that we would have a nice day home together. We'd watch some movies and just hang out. I was wrong.

Over the course of the day the following happened:

1. Cadence started playing with the ornaments on the Christmas tree. She's SEVEN! She knows better than to play with the Christmas tree!

2. I sat Cadence and Gabriel down at the kitchen table to eat lunch. Gabriel had already finished his and was working on seconds. Cadence had barely eaten two bites. I turned off the TV and told her to finish her lunch. No more than five minutes later she said she was finished. I didn't believe her so I went downstairs to investigate. Her empty bowl was in the sink. She said she had hurried and finished it. Anyone that knows Cadence knows that she is a terrible eater. She even makes herself throw up to get out of eating. It regularly takes her an hour to eat a few tablespoons of food. I told her that I didn't believe her. She said "I promise, Mommy. I swear to God. I ate it all gone." I addressed the issue with her several times throughout the day. At the end of the night, she finally admitted to feeding it to the dog. She waited until we were out to dinner to fess up (she probably worried less for her life confessing in a large crowd). We took some of her favorite items out of her room when we got home for lying. I need a more effective manner of punishment for lying and welcome suggestions. I'm thinking soap in the mouth right now.

3. While I was upstairs getting a clean outfit for Liam (who had spit up all over himself and me), Gabriel took a nativity candle holder that I was given for teaching Sunday school at my old church and hit it against my Christmas snow globe. The snow globe shattered, leaving shards of glass, water and glitter all over the couch. Fantastic.

4. Late in the afternoon I had sent the kids upstairs for "quiet time" (aka Mommy-is-at-her-wits-end-go-away-for-a-few-minutes time). They both ended up in Gabe's room and were running all over the place stomping and yelling. They woke up Liam who was sleeping soundly downstairs.

5. I put Cadence and Gabriel in time out in the center of the living room floor for #4. Apparently Gabe snuck a black crayon into time out with him. He marked on my living room carpet (which was professionally cleaned on Tuesday).

6. Cadence would only eat one bite of her chicken nuggets and 3 mandarin oranges for dinner. I probably shouldn't have allowed her to have such a special dinner after behaving so poorly all day. We took them to Chick-fil-a because it was our last chance to get a picture with all three kids with Santa since Cadence and Gabe are going to their nanny and papa's house today until Christmas Day.

Here is the picture that I had to have. Cadence's eyes are red because she had just been informed of the fate that awaited her for lying. I told her that her only hope of any for of redemption was to give me the biggest smile in the world so I could get my darn Santa picture!

After a day like that, I have to remember that they are always going to be bad days. Sometimes my kiddos manage to be total angels.

...or shepherds. You get the idea. :)

Liam's Birth Story

Just over twenty-four hours ago, on November 20th at 7:50 p.m. William "Liam" Lucas Hall made his grand entrance into this world weighing 9lbs 6oz and at 22 inches long. I have never been more relieved in my entire life.

Around 5:30 p.m., I begun having contractions on a regular basis. They were two minutes apart, but they weren't strong. This happened a few weeks ago and they stopped so I wasn't making too big a deal of it. Close to 6:00 p.m. I felt a pop. I stood up expecting to be standing in a puddle of clear fluid like you see in the movies. There was a puddle, but it wasn't clear. It was red. Bright red. Chris and I ran out of the house in less than two minutes and headed to the hospital. We called the doctor on our way. He said not to worry and that he would be there shortly.

We got to the hospital a few minutes after 6:00 p.m. They asked me if I could walk and I said, "yes" but told them what had happened. They put me in a wheelchair and took me upstairs. I filled out a few consent forms and was still talking through my contractions. They weren't really bad at that point. They got me in a room and said I was still 3cm dilated, which was no change from my appointment on Wednesday. They hooked me up to the monitors and the first thing I heard was the baby's heartbeat. I can't begin to describe the wave of relief that hit me when I heard that familiar galloping sound. By 6:45 p.m. the contractions were starting to pick up. I couldn't talk through them anymore and it was really hard to relax. I wasn't able to sit up because of the bleeding so finding a comfortable position was almost impossible. I knew that without the freedom to move there was no way I was going to be able to go through labor without an epidural. I asked for the anesthesiologist.

My doctor arrived just as the anesthesiologist came in. I was dilated to 6cm. The contractions were back-to-back and I felt so out of control. My doctor stepped out while the anesthesiologist administered the epidural and administered a test does of the medication. The test dose had not fully taken effect when I announced, "I'm pushing." One of the nurses reminded me that I was only 6cm dilated that that I needed to breathe through my contractions. I told her that I couldn't and my body was pushing without my consent. Another nurse told me that a team was on standby in case the baby needed special care due to the blood. My doctor came in and checked me again. He asked if I was ready to have this baby. I said no. I was so worried about Liam. My body disagreed and pushed anyway. I gave in and pushed four times.

After the fourth push I felt instant relief from the pain and heard crying. They placed Liam on my tummy and tried to wipe him off as best they could. At that moment, I felt like the weight of the world had been lifted off of my shoulders. I knew that God had been watching out for Liam.

After the delivery my doctor told me that it appeared that my placenta had partially separated from my uterine wall in early labor (also known as a placental abruption).

They gave me a dose of pitocin after the delivery to help stop the bleeding. Originally, we had planned to go home immediately after Liam's birth but, due to the amount of blood loss, we had to stay overnight to have my hemoglobin monitored. Everything seemed in check this morning and we left the hospital right at noon.

It definitely wasn't the birth that Chris and I had imagined, but it is wonderful to have Liam in our lives. Chris and I were both terrified yesterday and have been running on adrenaline ever since. We've only managed to sleep for a few hours since yesterday. Hopefully we can calm down and get some sleep tonight. Liam is doing well. He has some bruising on his head from his speedy occiput posterior (aka sunny side up) delivery, but is overall doing great!